NLD as an Adolescent Girl

Here’s a vignette from my past, brought back in the hopes of helping others:

Freshman year of high school, I obsessed over a senior boy and could not get over it. At the time, I wanted a relationship. I didn’t know how to tell if he liked me. I wrote notes and left them on his locker and even doorstep. I called his number just once, and talked to his mother but did not identify myself. Predictably, the crush was just that, and of course unrequited.

In a totally Queenbees & Wannabes moment, an older girl (friend of his) told a friend of mine I was out of line. Since I still had undiagnosed NLD, I took this criticism more harshly than what was intended (though I still maintain that school kids are often insensitive to each other, and could only attend a class reunion if all my good friends were there to talk with me). I sent an (accepted) apology back through the grapevine. I berated myself. I went to extremes. I asked my friends if they thought I was a stalker.

Fortunately they were on my side and would not let me over-criticize myself. I had no adult mentors back then, so I just had my same-age friends to run stuff by. In contrast to lots of NLD literature, I was able to see my errors and move on after a couple days. I now know just about everyone has a story like this, and I can laugh about it. I’m glad I learned not to over-crush, but I’d have other issues over the next few years.

Which brings me to a related point: NLD is not simply the NLD-person’s issues. NLD is just as much about how society views this LD.

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2 Responses to “NLD as an Adolescent Girl”

  1. C L Booth Says:

    I think I would like to talk to you about this, I had very traumatic experiences resulting from my NLD being undiagnosed. And I have noticed many of the people who were diagnosed before high school and junior high school just don’t have the same experiences.

    • hannahcamille Says:

      That’s a good observation. It’ll be good to discuss the late-diagnosis stuff, and life with NLD. I’m glad I’m not alone.

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