Never knowing how to deal with social situations

A friend’s close relative just passed away, and I read the notice in the newspaper. I’m debating whether or not to attend the service tomorrow. We both know people who I was once in conflict with. Since then I’ve done everything I could to amend these conflicts, but it’s very awkward. This friend has taken the time to hang out with me in the meantime, but recently we’ve been out of touch. I would like to go and express my respect for the process she is experiencing, but I don’t want to exchange friction with the conflict people. I counter with the fact that it’s been a long time and I tried my best to make up. I wish one of my friends could help me translate this social situation, but I don’t have anyone except my therapist, who I can’t talk to every time once of these awkward times faces me. My gut is I’ll be welcome at the service, but I’d like inner confirmation. NLD interferes with following my heart sometimes. It’s a big challenge to constantly deal with.


2 Responses to “Never knowing how to deal with social situations”

  1. Terri Says:

    Not sure if you want input here… but my gut also says that you will be fine at the service–services are pretty rote and seeing you will probably be comforting. for your friend. You may not really have a chance to talk to anyone. If you do it will mostly be talking about it being a sad circumstance, something nice about the service (the music or the speakers), and things like that. Even if there were tension most folks will make an exception under these circumstances–if things start getting colorful and conspicuous just excuse yourself and leave as quietly as possible.

    I think the possible comfort from seeing supportive folks around usually outweighs the risk unless the other folks are really dysfunctional, patently awful and loud about it. In which case, send a card.

    Just my thoughts…

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